A need for change.
It was a rainy December evening towards the end of 2020. It had been a long and exhausting year by all accounts. I was flopped out on the sofa, feeling tired, lifeless and devoid of all energy and motivation. I had been struggling all month...
Consumed by lethargy.
I had been struggling to find the energy to get out of bed in the mornings. Struggling to make my way through the ever-increasing piles of work I had building up. Struggling to step outside to face the gloomy, dark, rainy, cold, overcast, oppressive winter days. Struggling to do anything more useful and productive in the evenings than crashing out on the sofa, passively consuming complete rubbish on the TV, that added absolutely no value to my life whatsoever.
Turning into a hippopotamus.
I was aware that my lifestyle had become increasingly sedentary over recent years, and that my weight had gradually crept up to it's highest ever point, and that my general body shape was morphing into something more like a hippopotamus than that of a human being. I was also aware that my energy levels were at an all-time low, making it increasingly difficult to get through each day.
I needed to get myself out of this hole.
I needed to get my energy levels up and I needed to do something about my body. Not just because I wanted to 'look nice' but because but I'm aware that if I don't improve my health and fitness now, whilst I'm still relatively young, I'll be paying for it in the future.
At this stage, I felt that I was too far gone to be able to get back on track by myself.
I needed help.
I needed someone to push me. Someone to whom I was accountable and to whom I had to show regular improvements.
Getting a personal trainer.
I had been saying to myself for months, that I should get myself a personal trainer. Perhaps now, at this lowest point, it was time to stop just thinking about it and finally take action.
My first personal training session.
The day that I waddled along to my first session and stepped onto those biometric scales, the statistics I was presented with were quite sobering.
"Well, it's as we expected," said my personal trainer, gravely.
"You're very overweight".
I'd had a phone conversation with my new personal trainer just a couple of days earlier. I remember telling him how things were 'very bad' and that I was at the most unfit and inactive that I've ever been, and that I really needed to do something about it.
To be honest though, I hadn't thought it would be quite so bad as I was making out. My overly-optimistic self had expected him to be pleasantly surprised and to tell me that the situation isn't all that bad really. That I'm quite fit and healthy actually, and that I shouldn't be so hard on myself!
The truth hits home.
Hearing someone else confirming to me that yes, you really are very overweight, makes it finally sink in. The sugar-coated version of myself - the 'oh, it's a little bit bad but not so bad really' version of myself - that I held in mind's eye, had suddenly crumbled away, leaving just me, with my 77.45kg of weight and my 37.4% body fat!
One thing I realised at that point, was that I don't have a choice over whether to do this or not. If I care at all for my future self, then I have to make time for me, my health, and my fitness now.
Making a commitment.
So I made a commitment to get fit and healthy.
I made a commitment to turn up to my weekly personal training sessions, as well as doing regular exercise in my own time. I made a commitment to change my eating habits, and I devised a healthy eating plan for myself.
I also decided to write a weekly online weight loss journey journal, including a weekly food diary, to help keep myself focused, accountable and on track.